Brandon Flowers: Screenwriter?!

File this one under "you've got to be kidding me." The Killers, who have now further established the fact that they are nothing more than a marketing scheme, are planning to release a half-hour mini-movie based on three of their songs. Think Thriller but with really bad music. At least they don't plan on starring in it themselves. The awkward, stiff-as-a-board Brandon Flowers would look like an idiot on the big screen, just like he does on stage.

The movie, which will feature the songs "Jenny Was a Friend of Mine," "Midnight Show" and new song "Leave the Bourbon on the Shelf," is a murder mystery. Kinda fits, considering they call themselves The Killers and their first album, Hot Fuss, reads just like a murder mysetery itself. As I said before, they are not going to star in it. Instead they want "established actors" to play the roles. They've been talking with producers and actors, and the idea is to use this mini-movie to "bridge the gap" between Hot Fuss and their new album, which so far has 10 tracks with 30 more yet to be decided on, proof that bad music takes no time to write (not that we needed proof).

And the crowning jewel: It will be aired on MTV. With no commercial breaks, the movie will be no longer than an episode of The Newlyweds. Hardly enough to take seriously. So while I'm sure the viewer ratings for MTV in the girls aged 12 to 16 bracket will skyrocket during that half-hour, I think I'll stick to Degrassi on Noggin. At least it's educational. And doesn't have crappy music.

In other news...

Independent music publishing often involves a lot of people taking a lot of cuts from a lot of an artist's money. The Arcade Fire, however, are not going to have to worry too much about that anymore. The band just signed a publishing deal with EMI. This does not mean they've signed to a major label, so don't panic. They are still on Merge. What this does mean is that their album Funeral will finally get to be released in foreign countries, something The Arcade Fire probably couldn't have done without EMI. The album is slated for release in Japan at the end of July and in Eastern Europe later this year. Meanwhile, the band is in fact prepping to record a new album! Win and the gang will hit the studio in the fall after a quick U.S. tour in September. Start saying your prayers, Columbus.

The motivational speakers who used to come to my school from time to time would always tell us to "reach for the stars" and "dream big" or whatever. I think maybe Chris Martin heard this one too many times. Says Martin: "We want to be bigger than Mozart." What?! Okay, so the achievement and fame of the composers of Mozart's time didn't reach the level it is at today until long after the composers died, so it looks like Martin's going to have to watch it from the grave. I also don't think we're going to be hearing choirs and orchestras performing Coldplay songs any time soon. Seriously, dude, I think you should just stick to trying to be the next Bono. In related news, just weeks before its release, the new Coldplay album X & Y leaked to the internet.

I just love it when businesses and corporations who have absolutely no tie whatsoever to music or the music industry decide they want to jump on the bandwagon. First it was Toyota and the absolutely ridiculous record label Scion. Now it's the McDonald's kiosk. Currently in trial at the ultra-savvy Oak Brook, Illinois, location, the kiosks allow customers to buy music and ringtones, surf the internet and scan pictures. It will be a very odd day when I hear someone say, "Man, I really want a copy of that picture. Let's go scan it at McDonald's." Freaky. It's like the Twilight Zone or something. Also interesting to point out is that the Oak Brook location is McDonald's testing ground for new and trendier things. They serve lattes and everything. Ridiculous. I'm sorry, Mickey-D's, but you'll never escape your greasy hamburgers and golden arches.

Enough of me being irritated. How about something good? How about Xiu Xiu coming to Columbus? I think so! Xiu Xiu announced a slew of new tour dates, including August 30th at Little Brothers. How about that! Wait, you want more? Well, okay, how about the new album La Foret will hit the shelves on July 12th! Still not satisfied? How about a 7" split with Devendra Banhart coming out on July 26th? Ah, the craziness ensues. I'll see you at LB's.

It's Tuesday. Here's what's new in your local CD store:
Bjork - All of Me: Remixes and Covers
Four Tet - Everything Ecstatic
Her Space Holiday - Let's Get Quiet, Vol. 1
Oasis - Don't Believe the Truth
The White Stripes - Blue Orchid (CD Single)
The White Stripes - Blue Orchid Part 2 (CD Single)

Upcoming Columbus Shows

6.01 - Gang Gang Dance w/ The Bloodlines - The Wexner Center
6.02 - The Wrens - Little Brothers
6.03 - Tokyo Rose w/ Lux Courageous and Self Against City - High Five
6.08 - Modest Mouse - Promowest Pavilion
6.13 - Iron and Wine w/ Band of Horses - The Newport
6.15 - Travis Morrison - Supraphonic Studios (Where the heck is that?!)
7.07 - Reel Big Fish - Newport Music Hall
7.20 - Howie Day - Promowest Pavilion
7.20 - Luna Halo w/ Modena Vox - Skully's Music Diner
7.22 - Tegan and Sara - Newport Music Hall
8.11 - Ben Folds w/ Ben Lee and Rufus Wainwright - Promowest Pavilion
8.30 - Xiu Xiu w/ Das Yellow Swans and Nedelle? - Little Brothers
8.31 - Coldplay w/ Rilo Kiley - Germain Ampitheater
9.06 - Of Montreal - TBA

Daily Downloads
from the regnyouth archives

Beck - Guero (link, mp3)
Doves - Lost Souls (link, mp3)